Love Endures

Proverbs 31:26 (NET) - She has opened her mouth with wisdom, with loving instruction on her tongue.

Mother’s Day was a bittersweet time for me.

Mom passed away almost 15 years ago, and I still love and miss her very much.

That is why I was so grateful to receive an email from a friend who is a man of God.

Like me, he too had a wonderful relationship with his mother,

In his email, he reminded me how blessed both of us are for the mothers God gave us.

I readily agreed.

My faith would not be what it is had it not been for my mother.

Some of my earliest memories are of her telling me stories from the Bible.

She told them with great conviction.

Afterward, she took the time to answer the questions a young boy inevitably had.

That is why I always think of Proverbs 31 whenever I remember my mother.

The last half of this chapter describes a good wife.

I believe it also describes a good mother.

This year I wondered how Mom would have dealt with the current situation.

I concluded she would have been concerned.

But her concern would have been for others rather than herself.

In fact, two passages of scripture she cited most often were about concern and where to turn for help.

John 14:27 (KJV) - Peace I leave with you, my peace I give unto you: not as the world giveth, give I unto you. Let not your heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid.

Psalm 121:1-3 (KJV) - I will lift up mine eyes unto the hills, from whence cometh my help. My help cometh from the Lord, which made heaven and earth. He will not suffer thy foot to be moved: he that keepeth thee will not slumber.

Mother’s Day will always be a bittersweet time for me no matter how old I get.

That’s a good thing.

It reminds me how special she was to me.

It also reminds me others thought she was special as well.

Blessings,

Jim Pokorny

The Other Brother Jim

Look for me at https://otherbrotherjim.blogspot.com/ on Friday, May 22, 2020.

I’ll be back here on Friday, June 5, 2020

Mama's Boy

Sunday is Mother’s Day.

When I was young the term “Mama’s boy” was considered an insult.

If a boy was really intent on getting into a scrap with another boy on the playground then this phrase was almost sure to do it.

Frankly, it did not get much better when we grew older.

Now there is even a definition for it.

Today, “Mama’s boy” is a term for a man who is extremely attached to his mother at an age when men are expected to be independent.

In my case, being a “Mama’s boy” was born more out of necessity rather than choice.

My father died when he was a young man.

Shortly afterward, my mother’s health began to deteriorate.

Having no surviving siblings, it fell to me to make certain her needs were met.

Unlike my father, my mother lived into her advanced years.

As each year passed, she was physically able to less and less so she counted on me more and more.

Mother passed away about a decade ago, but I treasure all those years I was able to spend with her.

The faith she instilled in me as a boy she built on as I became a man.

While I am by no means perfect, I have come quite far.

The ministries I am involved in today would likely have surprised her.

They certainly have surprised me.

Looking back, I realize just how much my relationship with her prepared me for today.

I have no idea what God has in store for me tomorrow.

Whatever His plans are for me, it is likely that the relationship I had with her will play a pivotal role as well.

When I was a boy, she taught me with words.

As I became a man and she needed help just to get through the day, well, that is when she taught me by example.

Those are the lessons I have learned best of all.

When I was young the term “Mama’s boy” was considered an insult.

Today I consider them praise.

One more thing…

As I said, Mother passed away about ten years ago.

Not a day goes by that I do not think about her or miss her.

The love I have for her, however, has not died.

Such is the beauty of faith.

Scripture reminds us how vital it is to honor our parents.

Exodus 20:12 (NET) - Honor your father and your mother, that you may live a long time in the land the Lord your God is giving to you.

I believe that means honoring their memory as well.

Blessings,

Jim Pokorny

The Other Brother Jim

Look for me at http://otherbrotherjim.blogspot.com/ on Friday, May 13, 2016.

I’ll be back here on Friday, May 20, 2016

Unplanted Seeds

Proverbs 22:6 (NET) – Train a child in the way that he should go, and when he is old he will not turn from it.

When it comes to children and smart phones, I have mixed feelings.

To be honest, it bothers me when I see children spending time with their phones instead of interacting with each other.

I will admit that part of that is due to my age, but deep down I feel that interaction between people should not take a backseat to interaction with a device.

At the risk of sounding judgmental, I have discovered something that bothers me even more: parents who interact with their phones rather than their children.

In one day alone, I witnessed three separate events that caused me concern.

The first incident occurred as I sat in waiting area.

A young mother came in with her child in a carrier.

The moment she sat down to wait, she immediately got out her phone.

She became engrossed with it and never interacted with her infant child while I was there.

The child never took her eyes off her mother.

I pitied this child.

These formative years are critical and the stimulation of the mind is crucial.

Later that day, I stopped at a restaurant for lunch.

As I enjoyed my coffee, a man and his young daughter sat down at the next table.

The moment the father placed their order, he got out his phone and became engrossed with it.

The young girl just looked at her father as he stared into his phone.

Eventually boredom set in and she began to sing a little song.

She began singing quietly at first but sang louder with every word.

Suddenly she realized how loudly she was singing,

She became self-conscious and abruptly stopped.

She looked around to see if anyone had noticed.

We made eye contact and I offered her a smile.

She gave me hers in return.

Eventually I finished my coffee and returned to my car.

As I prepared to leave, the door of the restaurant opened and out came a man with his very young son.

The man held bags of food in one hand and was pressing his phone to his ear with the other.

As soon as they walked out the door, the boy bolted and ran across the parking lot.

I cringed as a car entered the lot.

Fortunately, the driver was able to stop in time.

I am now more concerned for today’s children than ever before.

I pray for them.

Scripture reminds us that it is important to train children.

It also reminds us that the seeds we plant today will bear fruit tomorrow.

If that is the case, what does it have to say about the seeds we fail to plant?

Blessings,

Jim Pokorny

The Other Brother Jim

http://otherbrotherjim.blogspot.com

Damaging Words

Matthew 19:14 (NIV)  - Jesus said, "Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of heaven belongs to such as these."

I am always amazed at how an event can bring back a memory with vivid clarity.

Last week, something I heard caused me to remember a most unfortunate event I witnessed many decades ago.

When I was a teenager, I went to a department store with my parents.

As soon as we entered the store, I left my parents and went directly to the sporting goods department.

As a teenage boy, this was one of the few areas of the store in which I had much interest.

Baseball season had just begun so I began looking at equipment made for that sport.

A young man in his twenties was there with his very young daughter.

He was looking at some golf clubs while his little girl amused herself by getting into practically everything.

When she got to the footballs, her eyes lit up.

She picked one up and brought it to her father and asked, "Will you buy me a football?"

Her father looked at her and said, "No. When you’re bigger, I’ll buy you a basketball."

Puzzled, the child asked, "Why not a football?"

The father answered, "Because girls don’t play football. They play basketball."

This only confused the child.

She then asked, "Why don’t girls play football?"

Then the man said something to his daughter that I will never forget!

He looked at his daughter and said, "Because God made girls slow and uncoordinated. That’s why!"

At this the little girl began to cry uncontrollably.

I was disgusted.

Then, as if to accentuate his ignorance, he added, "Don’t blame me. it’s not my fault."

This caused the little girl to cry all the more.

My heart bled for this child.

As I walked away, numerous questions raced through my mind.

I asked myself how a father could shatter a little girl’s self esteem the way he had just done.

This little girl trusted her father to always be truthful with her.

As far as she knew, he had been.

This man laid down a foundation for her future failures rather than her future successes.

I also asked myself how he was able to attribute such a lie to God.

Finally, I wondered what would have happened had the child’s mother heard these words.

At this, I realized that it was very probable that he treated her disrespectfully as well.

I said earlier that it was a recent event that brought this memory back.

When I was at the grocery store, I heard a mother publicly call her young son an "idiot".

When I hear parents speak to their children in such ways, it breaks my heart.

Positive words and encouragement serve to build a child up over time.

Negative words and unjust criticisms can tear them down in a heartbeat.

This is especially true of the words spoken by those children should be able to trust completely.

When dealing with a child one do well to heed Biblical caution.

Matthew 18:10 (NET) - "See that you do not disdain one of these little ones. For I tell you that their angels in heaven always see the face of my Father in heaven.



Blessings,
Jim Pokorny
The Other Brother Jim
http://otherbrotherjim.blogspot.com

Mothers Every Day

This coming Sunday is Mother's Day in the United States. Millions of dollars will be spent on greeting cards, flowers, and other gifts for mothers. And yet, mothers and motherhood are still undervalued in contemporary culture and among too many people--even many who consider themselves Christians. Elderly mothers, typically widowed, are often left alone and virtually forgotten, even by children who live nearby. In other cases, enmity over some past slight or disagreement festers between a grown child and his or her mother, and they stop speaking to each other. Tempers flare because a mother is thought meddlesome for offering advice or an opinon. On a wider social level, pressure on young women to forgo raising children and pursue a career outside the home is enormous, and those who put family life first are widely depicted in the media as fools, rubes, or afflicted with a miserable, empty life.

In God's Kingdom, on the other hand, mothers and motherhood are treasured and vitally important. We are commanded to honor and reverence our mothers (Exod. 20:12; Lev. 19:3), to heed their teaching (Prov. 6:20), and. in our righteous obedience, to "let her rejoice who gave birth to you." (Prov. 23:25)  We must not dishonor or grieve our mothers through foolishness (Prov. 10:1) or rebellion (Prov. 30:17; Micah 7:6). For her part, a mother is admonished to love her children as well as her husband, to be discreet and chaste, and to be a good homemaker, so as to honor God (Titus 2:4-5). Above all, a mother is to "teach [God's commandments] diligently unto thy children, and shalt talk of them when thou sittest in thine house, and when thou walkest by the way, and when thou liest down, and when thou risest up." (Deut. 6:6-7)  We have the archetype of faithful motherhood in Mary, the mother of our Lord Jesus, who reverently accepted the great responsibility that God placed upon her, diligently taught and cared for her Diviine Son, grieved inexpressibly to witness His suffering and death, and gloried in His resurrection.

There is in all literature no more apt description of the good wife and mother than that found in Proverbs 31:

Strength and honour are her clothing; and she shall rejoice in time to come.
She openeth her mouth with wisdom; and in her tongue is the law of kindness.
She looketh well to the ways of her household, and eateth not the bread of idleness.
Her children arise up, and call her blessed . . .  (Prov. 31:25-28)

I have been so infinitely blessed to have this image fit the mothers who figured most prominently in my life--my own mother and my dear wife, the mother of my children!

Honoring, caring for, and blessing our mothers is not something that can or should be done just through a card one day a year. The relationship between a mother and a child is infinitely precious in God's sight, and one that lasts for eternity--it should be treated accordingly!  If there is friction or enmity between you and your mother, heal it now and completely.  You can't imagine what blessings flow from simple apology and forgiveness!  No matter how young or old they are, children and mothers should be speaking with and visiting each other as often as reasonably possible--no one should ever be alone and forgotten! And no feasible expense or effort should be spared to take care of our aging mothers (or fathers), and to see that their grandchildren get to know and love them deeply.

In other words, treat every day as Mother's Day!

Tom Fleming

Songs of Praises